Broxifers…
The nine year old wants boxers.
He’s had enough of the hybrid leg hugging briefs.
“Can we get them tomorrow?” he asked.
“What’s your rush?”
“I REALLY. WANT. THEM” he overstated.
Turns out a popular skateboard company has a brand of boxers that ALL the boys have. Well, just Chris the neighbor but that’s enough to convince the boy to start hanging free.
“Do you know what a recession is?” I asked.
“No” he said, flatly.
“Everybody has to stop spending money on things they don’t need or we’re going to all run out of money” I explained.
“But I really want them-
“That’s too bad. We can’t always get what we want. Just because you want something doesn’t mean you’re going to get it.”
I waited three beats then said as evenly as possible.
“We don’t have money for that”
“When will we have money again?” he asked rolling his eyes.
“When the recession is over” I was starting to get louder.
“When will that-
“Ask your father!” I yelled.
He ran away muttering under his breath, something about me being mean.
If he argues about new underwear again I’m going to hand him a pair of scissors so he can cut the crotch out of his gotch and free his boys.
Just doing my part to help the economy.
Comments (2)
Oh, I've been there. For the boxer shorts thing I mean. Not that I'm awash with cash nowadays or anything.
Posted by: blackbird on February 7, 2009 6:17 PM
JERRY: Well, it looks like you've adjusted to the boxers.
KRAMER: Well, I wouldn't go as far as that.
JERRY: You went back to the Jockeys?
KRAMER: Wrong again.
JERRY: Oh, no.
ELAINE: What? What?
JERRY: Don't you see what's goin' on here? No boxers, no Jockeys...
ELAINE: Ewwww.
JERRY: The only thing between him and us is a thin layer of gabardine. Kramer, say it isn't so.
KRAMER: Oh, it be so. I'm out there, Jerry, and I'm lovin' every minute of it!
JERRY: Don't you need a little... help?
KRAMER: Surprisingly, no. I'm free, I'm unfettered... feel like a naked innocent boy roamin' the countryside!
Posted by: Cosmo Kramer on February 10, 2009 3:18 AM
